Angels in My Dreams

I had a dream last night that I was back in Haiti, back at God's Littlest Angels and holding my babies again. They were bigger and chubbier and beautiful. I kissed them and hugged them and smelled them again.

It was heavenly.

Before and After

A conversation I had today got me thinking about how far I've come in my life, particularly in the last six years. And, since the children of Haiti are ever-present in my heart, mind, and soul I immediately linked my journey to theirs. In a way they are the same, in another way they are so different.
Sometimes we don't know how broken we are until we are healed.
That is my story.
I didn't know how broken I was, until I began to heal. I didn't realize how far I've come until today, when I revisited my "before."
These children have been broken and are healing, but their journey has been painfully, glaringly obvious. They could not hide their ribs, sunken cheeks, lifeless eyes, and weak limbs. They could not hide their devastation - they had to heal in front of the world.
Like me, these children did heal, they did change, they did persevere. It tears at my heart to see their "before" pictures because I want to think of them only as "afters." We can't ignore their journey, or the journey of the thousands of others that are struggling to heal at this moment.
Everyone has a "before" and an "after."
For some of us, it's a journey of character.
For others, it's a journey of survival.

              Before                        After                                                   

Please don't forget them.

I can't.

~Emily

"God is closest to those with broken hearts..."

I've been back from Haiti for more than two weeks and still...when I look at my pictures my heart aches for these children. These babies that wrapped their little fingers around mine and nestled their soft curly hair into my neck. These babies who loved me simply because I held them, because I loved them too. I can't explain how empty my arms are without them. Before I went to Haiti, I didn't realize this space in my heart existed until those children placed their love there and now that I am home, I am not sure how to fill it again.
God is still moving mountains in my heart, two weeks later. Big changes are occurring, and a new future is emerging for me. Change is never easy - my heart is breaking and healing at the same time. God is so good.
~Emily